By Bemi Brooks 
Ever scrolled through your feed and seen a woman being utterly, brilliantly herself—maybe she’s posting a bold opinion, a quirky dance, or just existing in a way that doesn’t ask for permission—only to find the comments flooded with sneering remarks? “Who does she think she is?” “So shameless.”
If you’ve ever felt a flicker of frustration at that digital moral policing, then you’ve already brushed up against the energy that fuels a powerful term: utanmazkzılar.
It’s a word that, on the surface, sounds like an insult. But dig a little deeper, and you’ll find a fascinating story of reclamation. Young people, particularly women and LGBTQ+ individuals, are grabbing this label and turning it into a badge of honor. It’s become a digital-age shorthand for a simple, radical idea: I refuse to be shamed for who I am.
So, what’s really going on here? Let’s pull back the curtain.
Understanding Utanmazkzılar: From Insult to Empowerment
To get why this reclamation is such a big deal, we need to break down the word itself. “Utanmaz” translates to “shameless,” and when combined, it creates a potent, often gendered, slur meant to silence and control. It’s the classic tool of the patriarchy: when you can’t control a woman’s actions, you attack her character by labeling her as devoid of shame.
But here’s the twist. The very people this word was meant to hurt are now saying, “You know what? You’re right. I am shameless.”
- Shameless about what? Shameless about their bodies, their desires, their ambitions, their failures, and their right to take up space, both online and off.
- It’s a Rejection of Double Standards: Think about it. A man is called “confident”; a woman is called “bossy.” A man is “playing the field”; a woman is “promiscuous.” Utanmazkzılar pushes back against this entire framework. It asks, “Why are your rules for me different?”
- The Digital Playground: This reclamation is happening primarily on platforms like Twitter, Instagram, and TikTok. These are the modern public squares where identities are forged and battles over culture are fought. Using the term as a hashtag or in a bio is a way to find your tribe and signal your values without saying a word.
In fact, the journey of this word is a perfect example of what linguists call semantic reclamation. It’s the same process that transformed slurs into terms of empowerment for other marginalized groups. It’s about sucking the poison out of the word and filling it with pride.
The Practical Guide to the Utanmaz Kızılar Mindset
Adopting this mindset isn’t about posting one specific thing or following a trend. It’s an internal shift that manifests in your digital (and real) life. It’s about building what my friend Elif calls her “internal shame-proof vest.”
Here’s what that can look like in practice:
1. Curate Your Digital Space with Intention.
Your feed is your territory. If an account consistently makes you feel small, judged, or “too much,” that’s not a you problem—it’s a them problem. Use the mute and block buttons liberally. They are your digital shields. Fill your feed with people who inspire you, make you laugh, and remind you that your authentic self is more than enough.
2. Redefine “Oversharing” for Yourself.
Who gets to decide what is “too much” information? The concept of oversharing is often just a polite way to tell someone to be quieter, smaller, less real. The utanmazkzılar philosophy asks: Is it oversharing, or is it just being honest?
- Before: “I can’t post about my struggles with anxiety; people will think I’m seeking attention.”
- After: “Sharing my story might help someone else feel less alone. My mental health is part of my human experience, not a secret.”
3. Celebrate Others Publicly.
One of the most powerful acts of rebellion is to actively support other people who are being their unapologetic selves. See a woman getting criticized for her success? Leave a comment celebrating her. Witness someone being shamed for their style? Send them a DM saying you love it. This creates a network of support that makes it safer for everyone to be bold.
4. Embrace the “Block and Move On” Protocol.
You will encounter trolls. It’s a law of the digital jungle. The utanmazkzılar way is to refuse to engage in debates about your own worth.
- Do not: Write long, emotional replies justifying your existence.
- Do: Block the account, maybe report it if it’s abusive, and then go have a cup of tea. Your energy is precious. Don’t let them steal it.
The Future of This Unapologetic Movement
So, where is all this heading? Is utanmazkzılar just a passing internet slang, or does it have legs?
In my view, this is part of a much larger, global cultural shift. From the body positivity movement to the fight for LGBTQ+ rights, the common thread is a demand for autonomy and a rejection of shame as a tool of control. The digital world has simply given this age-old struggle a new vocabulary and a powerful megaphone.
The future will likely see this mindset seep further into our offline lives. It will influence fashion, art, workplace dynamics, and even how we parent the next generation. The goal isn’t to create a world without rules, but a world where the rules aren’t used to systematically silence specific voices.
However, it’s also important to acknowledge the pushback will continue. As the movement grows louder, so will the attempts to shame it into silence. The key is to remember that the criticism often says more about the critic’s insecurities than it does about your worth.
3 Actionable Steps to Embrace Your Inner Utanmaz Kızıl
Feeling inspired but not sure where to start? You don’t have to post a viral video tomorrow. It begins with small, conscious choices.
- Perform a “Shame Audit”: Take 15 minutes and scroll through your social media feeds. Notice which posts, from others or your own, trigger a flicker of shame or judgment—either for yourself or for them. Just observe it without judgment. Awareness is the first step to dismantling it.
- Make One Small, Authentic Post: Share something you genuinely love but might have previously thought was “cringey”—a song, a hobby, a “silly” opinion. It’s a small act of claiming your digital space for you.
- Support One Other Person: Today, find one person in your feed or in your life who is being boldly themselves and send them a message of support. A simple “I see you, and you’re amazing” can be a powerful shield against the world.
The journey of utanmazkzılar is a reminder that language is alive. We don’t have to just accept the definitions we’re given. We can tear them down, rebuild them, and use them to build a world where everyone feels a little more free to be their messy, complicated, brilliant, and utterly shameless selves.
What are your thoughts on this reclamation of language? Have you seen or experienced this in your own circles? I’d love to hear your perspective in the comments below.
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FAQs
Isn’t “utanmazkzılar” still an offensive term?
Context is everything. When used as an insult by someone to shame another, yes, it is offensive and should be called out. However, the core of the reclamation movement is about the affected community repurposing the word for themselves, thereby robbing it of its power to harm. It’s an act of defiance.
Is this movement only for women?
While the term is often gendered and its reclamation is led largely by women and non-binary individuals facing specific societal pressures, the underlying philosophy of resisting shame and embracing authenticity is universal. Anyone who feels constrained by societal judgment can connect with its message.
Doesn’t being “shameless” promote negative or harmful behavior?
This is a common misunderstanding. The movement isn’t about a lack of ethics or empathy. It’s about rejecting unjust shame—the kind used to police harmless self-expression, ambition, or identity. It draws a clear line between societal judgment and genuine moral wrongdoing.
How can I support this movement without using the term myself?
Absolutely! The most powerful support is through action. Amplify voices you believe in, call out shaming when you see it, and create inclusive spaces where your friends feel safe to be themselves without judgment. The mindset matters more than the specific vocabulary.
What if I face serious online harassment for being more outspoken?
Your safety is paramount. Utilize platform tools (block, report, restrict) aggressively. Document severe harassment. Don’t hesitate to lean on your support network and, if needed, disengage entirely. Being “shameless” doesn’t mean you have to endure abuse; it means you know the abuse is about them, not you.
Is this just an online trend, or does it have real-world impact?
The online space is a real world for many, especially younger generations. The confidence and community built online directly translate to offline behavior, influencing everything from personal relationships to career choices and political activism.
Can men be part of this?
Men can and should be allies by examining how they might unconsciously participate in moral policing, by championing the women and LGBTQ+ people in their lives, and by embracing their own authentic selves free from restrictive masculine stereotypes.